ici.

we are there. the future gently cupped us...

forcing my lips to fit that dienstag.

here, i came running to the

chain-linked fence:

while walking past rain

one of us will leave the other

marking the lost shore of eden.

secret revelations.

date unknown. recent, but unknown.

--i ran from here to there to make it on time. the brief respite of these train rides prepare me for the intensity that will be them in an hour. i am laughing...it was only three days ago when i was filled with loneliness and now i have no time alone! it all works out in the end. one of the "mixes" keeps me company...strobes in the pool. deep breaths. soon we will be there and i must be on my best behaviour. summertime would be mroe eventful with close friends but right now i must make some news and try my hand at french! one month! oh! so much to do...by the time this mix is finished i will be swallowing the old air of this city wishing for water.... AYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYE.

daydrifter

they are sleeping when i leave them.
i pin my dress down to prevent my legs height from showing.

the wind is picking up and blows the left loose flaps from east to west.

looking around i long to feel the difference in the buildings faces, an amendment to my 

exploratory essence.

the park nearby offers a shady spot to read about april and the end of the war.

a chill slips by and urges me to make my way home.

i recall my initial moments of this day...wandering into the sengelese consulate, sitting down and just reading amongst 

the faces. im a pale abstraction but right then, i realized how comfortable i felt...a good omen.

the rescue.

...i saved a bee from death...

il faut aller de l'avant.

time has suddenly ceased to exist in my brain. days melted into mere hours while years stretched out into eons. it would be impossible to be in schedule now. sleep has come and gone and come and gone and come and gone elsewhere. music is my only sanity. my impulses and synapses are firing and flowing and pushing me directions i can only find maps to in my dreams. School has ended, and london too has flew through my being…here i am trying to make sense of my backwards direction. loneliness is the only thing that feels right. soon surprises will be seen and soon things will begin to slip into position. is there really a need for me to do anything? YES.

i arrived from london breathless and sans speech. a whirlwind of confusion and reserve and wildness co-existing within the same storm, it is beautiful what a good shot of whiskey will do, let alone three…i’m trying to reign myself in, but some things are better left alone to greater spirits. Morphing like a deep bruise---black purple blue yellow skin---that spot will forever maintain the memory even when the stain has faded.

the family greeted me with such love. conversations and hugs and invitations for dinner and promises of future visits…i loved at instant. their sweetness overwhelms.

soon to figure myself out. soon to find the path i will take. So dangerous a time…please forgive me, but really i’m lacking the language to say what i mean.

kismet.

the movement is moving me. and i am allowing the water to direct my path. wonderful times ahead. so much to do today! the end of days...before i start on yet another path. to do list is becoming shorter and i am getting more sleepy. these last days have really changed my life...i couldn't be more content. the excitement for life is large and terribly intense. so much is happening around me...and elsewhere. my stomach is craving more, but it is not lunch time...last little things before it is time to leave. 1o things left to do. 5 heures. not much to say, everything is just a feeling, a pressure. my english is fading my eyes are drifting..a late night with new friends. wonder what the weekend will bring...?

a dieu.